We are Truly Blessed.

The title of this post says it all. We have each other, and though there are times we want to strangle each other, we never give up on each other. We are the perfect mix of goofiness/seriousness, brains/airheaded-ness, and dreamy/reality checks. Where one lacks, the other picks up. i believe we compliment each other well.

We also have a wonderful house. It’s older, and needs much updating, but it’s spacious, with a big back yard, and it’s ours. There are room for our two children and two giant dogs to run and play without feeling crowded. It also has plenty of room for our expanding family by two! It may not be perfect for many, or perfect at all, but it’s perfect for us.

We have 2 good condition, working vehicles. One newly bought to hold the 6 of us. We also have a third vehicle for those situations no one wants to be in or pay for. Ya know… if one of the main vehicles has the transmission blow, starter goes out, or any of the million things that can go wrong with a vehicle that requires a more-than-one-day shop visit.

Jason and I both have jobs that pay all our bills with a small tad left over. We don’t have much to work with afterwards, but we have jobs that pay the bills and give our family a little money to play with. We’re expanding our savings little by little, and sometimes we don’t quite make it paycheck to paycheck, but I am thankful for what our income has provided thus far and what is yet to come.

But most importantly, I am blessed for two very healthy children. Broden and Kensli are the light in our eyes and we are truly blessed for what we have been given. I feel honored to be their mom/step mom and wouldn’t want it any other way.

Although we were not expecting to have two more children added to our family, we know that they are ours for a reason. It’s hard to complain and see negativity about such a true gift when I know others in this world are just praying for one child to be brought into their lives.

I read a woman’s blog about her and her husband’s journey with infertility and miscarriages. It is truly heartbreaking. And it made me so thankful for everything we do have and for what is yet to come. She stands by her faith even in the most heart-wrenching times. Something I don’t know if I could do. If you know me at all, you know, I’m not the most religious person out there. I go to church for the holidays and I believe in God, but sometimes, things happen that make me wonder if he really is there. I don’t dog those that are 110% believers, or those that are 110% non-believers. I believe everyone has a right to their own opinion, but after reading some stories… it’s just hard to believe. This is one of those stories.

The story of Holly and Darren Benson had me in tears as I read their story. And I pray for them. And not only them, but any family who has to deal with infertility, miscarriages, or child loss.  My heart breaks. And I can’t imagine…. I just can’t. And what hits even harder, is that us, and by us, I mean all those who are not affected by it, always have the wrong things to say. And not on purpose, but because we have never gone through this pain to know what to say. The last thing anyone of us wants to do is make it more painful, but I am truly sorry if I ever said anything ever in the past, that did not ‘help’. It even has me second guessing asking couples when they are going to start having children. Maybe they have already tried for a year? It really isn’t anyone’s business when a couple decides to expand their family. And it makes it worse, if they so desperately want to expand, and have been trying for years, and everyone continues to ask them over and over, as if they are ‘failing’ because they haven’t done the next step after marriage. It’s not an easy topic to discuss. For anyone. So please… before you find it your place to know a married couples personal business, think twice. Holly has actually put together a guide to help us all with infertility couples, to help understand. Please take a moment to read it.

I also follow Nick and Beth and they have a similar story, but with a positive outcome. They have also spoken about their story on their blog, and have a tab dedicated to it, and even with their beautiful twins, it’s still hard to imagine the difficult journey they have gone through. Please, go to either blog and read their stories. I feel it’s necessary for anyone and all to read. To get an insight of the pain. If anything, to help all of us stop taking advantage of what we do have.

I always feel uneasy when it’s talked about how ‘easy’ Jason and I conceive. I don’t know who around me has suffered. Even my own family members may have a secret they are not ready to share. And the last thing I want to do is discuss my fertility. Yes, we are blessed. I know that, as does he. And I couldn’t be happier with where we are today. But I know there are suffering families out there. Families that dream of being in the delivery room at 40 weeks, pushing out their future of diapers, spit up, diarrhea, Disney movies, and cute onesies. Families that dream that they’ll be able to help their children with homework or take them to football, dance, and/or band practice. Families that just want nothing more than to kiss a child good night and wake up to a smiling face the next morning. I pray for all of you. I pray your prayers are answered.

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