The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly.

Well, today was weigh in day. Ugh. Will there come a day that I don’t dread that damn scale so much? Just walking past it gives me the heebie jeebies.

But I did weigh in. And the good is I went in the right direction. I didn’t stay in the same spot or go the wrong way. I was happy with that. I am proud of that.

But the bad is I only lost one pound. I’m at 213.  At the very least I wanted to lose one pound a week. At the most? I wanted two pounds a week, which would have put me at my first mini goal of 10 pounds down! Then, a picture and an updated table would have accompanied this post. But, nope. Not yet.

The ugly? I now have 7 weeks to lose 14 pounds.

However, I do only have myself to blame. In the last two weeks, we had a lot going on. My brother’s fiancé’s bachelorette party, a country concert, my dad’s birthday, my in-laws annual fish fry, a wedding, prepping all the baby clothes to sell in a huge consignment store sale, getting all said clothes to the sale, school started, and soccer started as well. Not to mention the hubster’s has now decided he wants to start running.

That doesn’t include the random grocery store trips and errands we had to run.

Seriously. We have been busy. With busy comes early mornings and late nights. I have been utterly exhausted so 4:45 am comes and then goes, all while I’m still getting more ZZZ’s. Now that school has started, my school agers are gone during nap time, who helped listen for kids cry while I worked out in the basement. I can’t hear them cry while I’m down two floors and with the treadmill running. And after work? Ya… that’s a damn joke. The twins have to be fed, supper has to be made and then eaten, and by that time it’s 7:30-8. Bed time for the two is 8:30-9. I could go at 9…. but it takes me so long to wind down after working out, it’d be 1 am before I fell asleep.

With our busy schedule, we had to eat on the run constantly. When you’re trying to change the ways you look at food… the most depressing sight on a road trip is those damn golden arches. McDonald’s is not exactly known for their weight loss menu. But. I sucked it up and ordered a grilled chicken wrap. Which is huge for me. I hate chicken at fast food restaurants. I don’t know why, it just tastes nasty. As if it’s not even real chicken… {it probably isn’t.} But at least with the veggies and such in the wrap, it helped hide the taste. But it was soooooo difficult to not order a quarter pounder with a diet coke. And by the 800th trip to a fast food, I finally gave in and ordered something shitty.

So in all honesty, how I even lost a pound, is besides me. But, I’m glad I did. I was scared shitless to step on that damn thing this morning.

I’m not proud. But it happens. Life happens. And I have two options from where I’m standing. I can say fuck it, I’ve blown everything this past two weeks, I might as well give up because it’s almost impossible to even get a half hour work out in and I’ve ate like shit. So there isn’t any point in continuing to try. And give up. Like I have done 100% of the time in the past.

Or.

Face it, suck it up, and move on. I could realize that even though the scale only said a -1, I still moved in the right direction. Realizing there are shitty hours, days, and/or weeks should motivate me to kick ass the following weeks. Those bad times are going to happen. I need to work on not letting it happen on such a large scale, but that’s part of the journey. Is figuring the journey out. I’m still struggling. But I’m making better choices now that I ever did in the past. So I can be happy with my lousy pound and go pick up a dumbbell.

I’m not trying to come up with excuses. I could have found time real early in the morning or really late at night. But it’s incredibly hard.

And it’s scary now bike riding at 5 am. The sun doesn’t come up until closer to 6… and those trails have no lights. It’s hard to see a damn thing. I need a light or two for my bike and I would feel much better. But then… that cost money, which is what we don’t have.

But after these two weeks, I’ve learned a thing or two. I’ve figured out some things I need to do different.

Figuring out a damn meal plan would be the start of that. Planning out on the weekend what I’m going to eat for breakfast, lunch, snacks, and dinner would help me be prepared during the week and hopefully I could actually fit eating into my schedule on a daily basis.

Second. I want to work out at least 5 times a week, but would rather do 6, for at least an hour to two hours. So with that said, I’m going to get up at 4:30 every morning {except Friday} to run/walk or bike ride and lift weights. Saturday or Sunday morning, depending on which day is more free, I plan on going on a decent bike ride. Maybe 15-ish miles, if not 20.

And third. No fast food. I’m not ready to test my will power against the call of McDonald’s or Taco Johns. If anything quick is required, Subway it is. And that’s that.

And maybe someone will look into my treadmill…? Any electricians out there?  In the middle of running, it just resets it’s self, which brings the treadmill to a complete halt… and I run straight into the dashboard thing. It feels soooo grand having a dashboard stab me in the gut. Let me tell you. I can only take so many collisions in one workout.

But I can’t afford a gym membership, so, if I don’t have a treadmill, I’m not sure what I’ll do quite yet.

But let’s cross that bridge once we get there.

Until text time,

Loves and toodle-o’s!

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