The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly.

Well, today was weigh in day. Ugh. Will there come a day that I don’t dread that damn scale so much? Just walking past it gives me the heebie jeebies.

But I did weigh in. And the good is I went in the right direction. I didn’t stay in the same spot or go the wrong way. I was happy with that. I am proud of that.

But the bad is I only lost one pound. I’m at 213.  At the very least I wanted to lose one pound a week. At the most? I wanted two pounds a week, which would have put me at my first mini goal of 10 pounds down! Then, a picture and an updated table would have accompanied this post. But, nope. Not yet.

The ugly? I now have 7 weeks to lose 14 pounds.

However, I do only have myself to blame. In the last two weeks, we had a lot going on. My brother’s fiancé’s bachelorette party, a country concert, my dad’s birthday, my in-laws annual fish fry, a wedding, prepping all the baby clothes to sell in a huge consignment store sale, getting all said clothes to the sale, school started, and soccer started as well. Not to mention the hubster’s has now decided he wants to start running.

That doesn’t include the random grocery store trips and errands we had to run.

Seriously. We have been busy. With busy comes early mornings and late nights. I have been utterly exhausted so 4:45 am comes and then goes, all while I’m still getting more ZZZ’s. Now that school has started, my school agers are gone during nap time, who helped listen for kids cry while I worked out in the basement. I can’t hear them cry while I’m down two floors and with the treadmill running. And after work? Ya… that’s a damn joke. The twins have to be fed, supper has to be made and then eaten, and by that time it’s 7:30-8. Bed time for the two is 8:30-9. I could go at 9…. but it takes me so long to wind down after working out, it’d be 1 am before I fell asleep.

With our busy schedule, we had to eat on the run constantly. When you’re trying to change the ways you look at food… the most depressing sight on a road trip is those damn golden arches. McDonald’s is not exactly known for their weight loss menu. But. I sucked it up and ordered a grilled chicken wrap. Which is huge for me. I hate chicken at fast food restaurants. I don’t know why, it just tastes nasty. As if it’s not even real chicken… {it probably isn’t.} But at least with the veggies and such in the wrap, it helped hide the taste. But it was soooooo difficult to not order a quarter pounder with a diet coke. And by the 800th trip to a fast food, I finally gave in and ordered something shitty.

So in all honesty, how I even lost a pound, is besides me. But, I’m glad I did. I was scared shitless to step on that damn thing this morning.

I’m not proud. But it happens. Life happens. And I have two options from where I’m standing. I can say fuck it, I’ve blown everything this past two weeks, I might as well give up because it’s almost impossible to even get a half hour work out in and I’ve ate like shit. So there isn’t any point in continuing to try. And give up. Like I have done 100% of the time in the past.

Or.

Face it, suck it up, and move on. I could realize that even though the scale only said a -1, I still moved in the right direction. Realizing there are shitty hours, days, and/or weeks should motivate me to kick ass the following weeks. Those bad times are going to happen. I need to work on not letting it happen on such a large scale, but that’s part of the journey. Is figuring the journey out. I’m still struggling. But I’m making better choices now that I ever did in the past. So I can be happy with my lousy pound and go pick up a dumbbell.

I’m not trying to come up with excuses. I could have found time real early in the morning or really late at night. But it’s incredibly hard.

And it’s scary now bike riding at 5 am. The sun doesn’t come up until closer to 6… and those trails have no lights. It’s hard to see a damn thing. I need a light or two for my bike and I would feel much better. But then… that cost money, which is what we don’t have.

But after these two weeks, I’ve learned a thing or two. I’ve figured out some things I need to do different.

Figuring out a damn meal plan would be the start of that. Planning out on the weekend what I’m going to eat for breakfast, lunch, snacks, and dinner would help me be prepared during the week and hopefully I could actually fit eating into my schedule on a daily basis.

Second. I want to work out at least 5 times a week, but would rather do 6, for at least an hour to two hours. So with that said, I’m going to get up at 4:30 every morning {except Friday} to run/walk or bike ride and lift weights. Saturday or Sunday morning, depending on which day is more free, I plan on going on a decent bike ride. Maybe 15-ish miles, if not 20.

And third. No fast food. I’m not ready to test my will power against the call of McDonald’s or Taco Johns. If anything quick is required, Subway it is. And that’s that.

And maybe someone will look into my treadmill…? Any electricians out there?  In the middle of running, it just resets it’s self, which brings the treadmill to a complete halt… and I run straight into the dashboard thing. It feels soooo grand having a dashboard stab me in the gut. Let me tell you. I can only take so many collisions in one workout.

But I can’t afford a gym membership, so, if I don’t have a treadmill, I’m not sure what I’ll do quite yet.

But let’s cross that bridge once we get there.

Until text time,

Loves and toodle-o’s!

It’s Time to Get Real.

Thank you all so much for the love from yesterday’s post. It was kinda a down-in-the-dumps-post, but after the week I had, I just felt like venting. It was the roughest week we had in a while and I apparently just needed to blow off some steam. But thank you for all your offers of help. We truly appreciate it! I think just getting out of the house once in a blue moon would help tremendously.

But onto something new. Like…. Kicking some fat’s ass???

So. I have been contemplating this post for quite some time now. Do I put my weight loss journey all out there for the world to know? Or do I continue to sugar coat things until I’m at a happy weight and feel comfortable baring it then, if at all? It’s incredibly hard for me to look at the scale or in the mirror and not cringe… let alone spilling the beans to all of you.

I have read numerous other weight loss blogs, one in particular that a friend introduced me to. Mama Laughlin is an amazing mom who has accomplished so much. When she started her weight loss journey, she also didn’t have money to join a gym and had to do a lot of things on a limited budget and work with what she had. She actually has been a huge inspiration. And it wasn’t until I read her My Soul is Bared post, is when I really thought to myself I can do this. And shortly after, I started this weight loss journey for real. But since the day I read that post… I have pondered this post that I am writing, and wondered if I actually could do the same. Would I immediately regret this post? There’s only one way to find out.

Before I spill the details, please go ahead and read the rules. Let’s make this a friendly environment and support everyone. And I don’t just mean me. But everyone who is trying to better themselves. For example that over weight gal who is running down the sidewalks, where most would poke fun, smile and tell her keep it up! Or the person who is completely out of place at the gym, who maybe doing something wrong. Stop and say, I was noticing you weren’t doing this correctly, let me give you some pointers and you’re doing awesome! Everyone can use a hand once in awhile, or just a compliment, or a ‘great job’.

Now. For the det’s.

When I got pregnant with the twinnies I was 5’9 at 205. Using those numbers, I am technically obese.

The morning I delivered the babes, I weighted 260 even. I never thought I would see that number in my life time. But I didn’t realize at the time, just how much weight I was carrying around in my stomach. 2 babies totaling over 9 lbs and 4 gallons of fluid. I rolled out of the surgery room 38 lbs lighter. In a half an hour. {Too bad losing weight the hard way doesn’t work that fast huh?}

Then my 6 weeks postpartum appointment came, and I weighed in at 222. And I figured, I’m not going to lose any more weight by just being lucky. It’s time to work.

So fast forward a little bit. I weighed in on July 9th and was 220 lbs. And I had had enough. I was done. I wanted my clothes to fit again. So the next morning, I got up at 5 am, and Beth and I went for an 8 mile bike ride. And started going every other day. Mostly. We’ve missed a couple days. But not many.

Starting July 10th, I was 5’9 and 220 lbs.

Here’s the table I created with my tentative goals :)  As I reach these goals, I get a pretty big reward! None of which is a food reward.

220# 210# 200# 190# 180# 170# 160# 150# 140#
L Bicep 14 ¾”
R Bicep 15 ½”
Boobs 45 ¼”
Under Boobs 40 ½”
Belly Button 44 ¼”
Hips 48 ¼”
L Thigh 28 ¼”
R Thigh 28 ¼”

July 10th Starting Weight: 220

October 10th 1st Quarter Weigh In:                                    {Goal: 199}

January 9th ~ 2nd Quarter Weigh In:                                {Tentative Goal: 174}

April 10th ~ 3rd Quarter Weigh In:                                    {Tentative Goal: 159}

July 10th~ Final Weigh in:                                                  {Tentative Goal: 140-150 lbs!}

 

Now for the rules.

I plan on taking a picture after every 10 lbs lost. {Although, I completely forgot to take a starting picture. So I’ll just find one that I’m in} I’ll take a front facing and side facing picture. When I take a picture, I’ll also add to the above table. I’ll create a new post with updated info in the table with all pictures for comparison.

My official weigh in dates is as listed above with my tentative goals. But I will also weigh in every other Friday morning.

Which today was weigh in day. And I am down to 214! 6 lbs down, only 15 more to go for my first quarter goal, and I still have 9 weeks left!

I’m getting excited about clothes fitting again. It’s going to be like having a whole new wardrobe! I can’t wait to feel like a whole new me. Someone who can keep up with their kids and want to take them to the pool all summer long. There are so many things I’d like to enjoy that I won’t because of my weight.

So bring this on. It’s time to kick some fat’s ass!

 

Work Out Week Two

Well, our second week of Kicking Fat’s Ass has ended and a lot of sweat had been shed. I have already posted about the first half of the week, but let’s talk about the second half, shall we?

Last Thursday was bike day, so we got up at 5 am, met at 5:20-ish and rode for about 10 miles. But damn. I was seriously struggling. I felt like with every bike ride it was getting harder and harder. My gears weren’t shifting and hadn’t for awhile. So I was going 10 miles on gear 2 or 3. I was peddling as fast or faster than Beth, and was going half the speed. And I didn’t realize how bad my bike was until today {which I’ll explain soon} I was a giant sweat ball when I got home. As if I had ran a marathon. And I hadn’t even come close.

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See what I mean? I feel like it took forever to go anywhere? I was working my ass off just trying to get to 10 mph!

Although the sun and fog were so gorgeous that morning I had to stop and take a picture!

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That evening, I decided to take my bike to Beth’s house. Beth and Travis have a roomie who works at a bike shop and actually works on bicycles! So I decided to have him just take a look and see what he could do. So I rode my bike to their house and Beth brought me home. Wasn’t much of a workout like I thought it would be. Only 2.97 miles. But I suppose, I got almost 13 miles in that day.

Friday was weight-in day. Which I was so nervous for. I had put in the work. All that my schedule would allow. Literally, every free moment I could muster, I tried fitting something in. I also woke up sicker than a damn dog that day. My throat hurt so incredibly bad I couldn’t swallow or talk. So I immediately text Beth at 4:30 that I wasn’t going to the gym. I was in so much pain. And it wasn’t work out pain.

I still decided to weigh in. I went potty (need all the help I can get) and hopped on the scale. Ready…?

1 lousy pound. That’s all I lost. Which I guess is at least in the right direction. but I was at the least, hoping for a 2 or 3.

And after that weight in, I just wanted to give up. My heart dropped and I just kept saying, if this is how my weight loss journey is going to be, why am I doing all this work? I was already putting so much time into this… time that I could be spending with my family. I’m eating way better than I have ever done while trying to lose weight. And exercising almost daily, sometimes twice in a day! So why continue for a 1 lb weight loss a week?

But then something clicked. Every time I have ever tried losing weight, I never put this much effort into it and I quit after the first sign of struggle. Which is why I am as heavy as I am now. This is where quitting has gotten me. Huge.

I want to look how I used to 11 years ago. I want to be that MILF that everyone has to do a double take at. I want to feel great and comfortable in my own skin and clothes. I want to be able to play with my kids without being winded after a couple minutes, or worse, watching them from a bench off on the side. I want to be able to keep up with my kids.

And I can’t do that quitting. That’s all I have ever done. It has taken me 11 years to put on the 70 lbs… I need to face facts and realize the 60-80 lbs I want to lose won’t come off in a few short months. I don’t have the luxury of working out for 10 hours a day or even able to spend money on a ton of extra healthy food that the whole family won’t eat. I have to work out when I can and keep the meals simple and cheap.

And it is what it is. So the sooner I face that, the better off I’ll be.

After my little pep talk, I went back to sleep and slept until Jason came home. Only waking up to feed the twins. I literally left Broden in charge of Kensli. But she for the most part snuggled with me and watched movies all day. {See, she can be sweet!}

After Jason came home, I went to the doctor to make sure I didn’t need medication, which thank goodness it wasn’t anything that required that. Came home, sat my ass back down on the couch, finally ate something other than saltine crackers, and went to bed shortly after that.

Saturday, I woke up feeling much better! My throat was still sore, but I could at least talk and swallow! So I woke up at 7, got ready to meet my cousin Jayme and a few of her friends for a walk around Gray’s Lake, and helped with the twinnies which caused me to be late. Still got there about 8:15 am.

We briskly walked around the lake, which was just over 2 miles. We ran a little… but damn. I am just not a runner. No matter how hard I try. Don’t get me wrong, I’m still attempting the Couch to 5k training. But it’s going to be a long haul.  Afterwards, we all met at Smokey Row coffee house, had a healthy breakfast sandwich which consisted of wheat toast, egg, ham, and a slice of cheese with an iced tea. We chit chatted a bit and headed on our merry way. It was nice to get some exercise in on a Saturday morning and get it out of the way.

But today. TODAY was the grand daddy of my exercising this week. Uncle Steve, Aunt Missy, Bethy, and I went on a 26 mile bike ride from Johnston to Gray’s Lake and back! And let me tell you, after Travis and Beth’s roomie fixed my gears and Uncle Steve aired up my tires… it was like a whole new bike!!!! I was more exhausted after our 10 mile bike rides in the morning than I was today after 26 miles. So thank you to Shaun and Uncle Steve for fixing my bicycle :)greatly appreciate it!

There were some tough spots, and the hills kicked my ass as you can imagine, but all in all, I feel like I did really well! I didn’t die, so that was a good start.

Although, my phone died with just a little over 4 miles left, but here were my stats at the point my phone died.

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But since my phone died, I wanted a screen shot of Uncle Steve’s phone since it had the full bike ride mapped out with the full mileage that we biked for. So this is the screen shot of his:

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We did stop on our way back downtown to have a small lunch where I had a grilled chicken salad and ice tea. It was quite delicious.

So I feel good about today. I think next weekend, since Jason is leaving for a week on vaca, Beth and I are going to take the girls to Gray’s Lake again… or somewhere… and walk it. But until then, we’ll be busting our asses all week.

Until next time Tipsy Sippy friends!

Love and Toodle’os!

First True Week of Kicking Fat’s Ass

Ahhhhhhh! I just got done with my bike ride and decided to sit down and start this post. My legs are all… weird. You know that feeling after you work out, and the muscles that were worked start pulsing and going spastic? Ya… it’s the weirdest feeling.

It’s time to share Kicking Fat’s Ass week 1. I had started a couple weeks ago, but schedules always got in the way. But I think I have a system down now. I’ll try to keep an update of my activities at the end of each week! :) But this week was excellent… exercise wise.

I wanted to inform you, I went biking every other morning at 5 am!!! I would go every morning, however, on my night/mornings with the babies, I was staying home incase they woke up. Beth and I are work out buddies and it has sure helped me getting my ass out of bed. We went Monday, Wednesday, and Friday mornings this past week. And by Friday… I was doing some serious struggling. And it was by far my worst day. Mostly because A) we went to the gym last night so I am super sore currently and B) Jason had to be in the office super early this morning and wanted to leave between 6:20 and 6:30. But I still got my ass up and went. Here are the numbers for this week.

Monday:

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Wednesday:

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And Friday (today)

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Beth also found a 14 day free trial pass to her gym. So we decided to start that… before Jason leaves me, with the kids, for a week in Minnesota, because I won’t be leaving the house much then, let alone going to the gym. And let me tell you, I was a hot mess. First of all, totally forgot to change before I left. I was wearing maternity ‘yoga pants’ which aren’t as tight as yoga pants… trust me. Plus a maternity pink tank, topped with spit up all over my chest, and a nursing sports bra. Which as you can imagine doesn’t have the greatest support. I’ll be making sure to give myself a good once over in the mirror before I leave next time for the gym.

Then I walk in and there are probably 8 beefy guys in there. That’s all. And by beefy, I mean huge muscles. I suddenly felt very… ridiculous. {Reason #1 why I hate the gym} We hopped on the elliptical first and whoa boy. It’s been awhile since I have been on that thing. But I felt my heart rate going crazy in our warm up which is always a good sign.

We then moved to the floor to do leg and ab workouts. I may or may not have looked ridiculous… but damn it! I did it all! And I am hurtin’ this morning! The most problem I had was the planks. Which are already hard… but then taking into account I just had my abs cut in half… made it slightly more difficult. And was actually kinda painful around the incision. But I toughed it out.

Let me tell you, if you want to look good exercising, you just come work out with me. I make anyone look like they know exactly what they are doing. Because I’m just struggling to keep going. I look like an estranged dog, pleading for someone to lift me up and carry me away, on my last breathe. Really. I’m just too glorious.

Then doing wall squats I felt like I was going to fall through the wall! I told Beth “I really don’t think this dry wall will hold me. And then I’m going to roll backwards into the work out room behind us and those boys are really going to see what all this can do.” Seriously. I’m so out of shape. But I suppose that’s why I’m doing this… to get back into shape.

In the room we did our floor exercises in, there were was all sorts of equipment. All stuff I see on Extreme Weight Loss and Biggest Loser shows. For example the row machine! And the ropes!! And the kettle bells!!! All stuff I would love to purchase to put in my home gym since I can’t afford a gym membership.

So I always thought the peeps looked sooooo cool working those damn ropes on the boob-tube! Making the giant wave that went all the way down the rope. Heck ya! So I stepped up, grabbed the handles, and immediately knew I wasn’t going to be as good as those people. Those bad boys were heavy!

So I decided to do them while Bethy looked for our workout on her pinterest page and I about died. First of all, they are so heavy duty that I was leaning clear back just trying to lift the damn things. Then trying to lift my arms high enough to make a wave… psh. It was hard!

So I decided next time.. I’ll try the kettle bells and row machine. And in the mean time, if anyone finds any of the above equipment for sale cheap, and/or an elliptical, please let me know!

What I really need to work on, is food. I need to eat more meals and healthier ones at that. And watch my portion control. So that’s my goal this week. Is to watch food like a hawk. Making a grocery list this afternoon after my hair appt and planning all my 35 meals for the next 7 days.

I’m also starting the couch to 5k workout… again. I started week one a couple weeks ago, and the following week none of my planned workout times worked out because of scheduling conflicts with either the hubsters, or the twins, or Kensli, or other things that of course popped up. I’m getting there. It’s just taking some time to really figure out a good schedule for me and leaving some flexibility in case that schedule doesn’t work out for whatever reason.

But regardless, I’m going to do this! Anyone else joining me on this work out journey? How are you doing with it?