My First Venture with 3 Children Alone…

Hello All.

Let me tell you about my trip to Zuri’s doctors appointment on Tuesday. When I got home, I was exhausted both physically and mentally. A trip out with newborn twins and a 3 year old is not for the faint of heart. Not. At. All.

Okay… from that last paragraph it sounds like we had the most disastrous trip that included a lost child, broken limbs, and multiple major mental breakdowns. I assure you, it wasn’t that bad. Kensli was actually pretty good. She was a helper most of the time, listened to the doctors and nurses and me, and entertained herself {not the most quietest moments of the day, but I didn’t care by that point} while the doctor and I discussed Zuri’s heart.

Well it started with just trying to get out the door.

See, my daughter suffers from Girly Object Syndrome. I send her on a task and the second she sees a toy of hers, or dress up items, or hair accessories… her focus is gone. MIA. Adios Amigo. So to get her ready to go anywhere… we start a half hour early. Now that there are two more to get around, we start an hour early. {That doesn’t even include the actual getting ready part, like clothes on, hair did, mom and dad ready, that’s just getting shoes on and everything and everyone IN the vehicle.} And that still is pushing it… We have still been late on occasions.

So to further explain Girly Object Syndrome, it went something like this:

She saw her hair ties and needed her hair like Elsa’s. Sorry kiddo no time.
She ‘couldn’t find’ matching socks. They were right in front of her.
She saw her candy. Of course was instantly starving.
Found her backpack. Couldn’t decide what to put in it.
Saw mommy’s bra. Had to wear it to the appointment. That was a giant negative.
Decided she had too many toys in her back pack. Couldn’t decide what to remove.
Saw one of her blankets. She was then too cold to move.
Noticed what socks she put on. Decided she didn’t want those.
Saw her princess wand. Needed to turn me into a frog.
Got angry at mommy, because I wouldn’t hop and ribit like a frog.

Annnnnnd I’m pretty sure I missed a few of her ‘problems’.

Phew. That was exhausting just typing it all out!

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Elsa Hair

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Finally we’re in the vehicle. But then she finds and starts reading this pregnancy book by Jenny McCarthy.  I watch her really try reading this book and decided since she’s so into reading, she should be reading her easy books, to help her actually learn to read. So I went back in to get her “Go Dog, Go” book. Gave it to her and she instantly lit up. That smile is why I continue to do the things I do, it’s just so damn precious!

So the entire way to Methodist Hospital, I heard the story of “Go Dog, Go”. No, she doesn’t know how to read. But. She knows this story. Front ward, backwards, sideways, and upside down. Hell, she doesn’t even need the book to read it. {Literally, she walks around reciting the words to this story.} She knows it that well. So, sneaky mom move ~ I just turned the radio up just a little bit more… Kicker? She’s in the back of a Yukon XL {think suburban}.. I shouldn’t hear her anyway, but. She’s just that loud. And very proud of her “Go Dog, Go” book.

Finally. We’re at the hospital. It takes me about 10-15 minutes to get the twins in the stroller and Kensli focused enough to hold my hand, hold her toys and apples, and walk at the same time. I walk in with my double stroller and toddler in tow and go straight to the guest services desk to find out where this cardiology room is. Well… there isn’t one. I called the Pediatric’s Cardiology number I luckily still had on my phone and they inform me, I am in fact, at the wrong place. They are not in the hospital silly mommy. They are on the other side of 235 by the other hospital, Mercy.

Flippin’ Fantastic.

Back to the Yukon we go. Twins in stroller and holding the toddler’s hand.

“Mom, did you screw up?” What? Where does she hear this stuff?

“Yes, mommy went to the wrong place. So we have to hurry baby.”

“Why didn’t you know what you were doing?” Gee.. pour a little more salt in that wound child.

“Because apparently mommy wasn’t on top of her game today.”

“Mom, you need to pay more attention to your games.” And turn that knife a little more. Am I really taking life lessons from my 3 year old? I suppose I am.

10 minutes later, we’re rollin. And arrive to our new destination… ON TIME!

As we are walking into the building, there is a man outside smoking. And heaven forbid we pass anyone without a comment from my very observant toddler.

“Mom, why are his pants weird?” A) we were 4 feet away from him. B) He just had jeans on… nothing weird at all. Why couldn’t she note the smoking and I could be the good mom and say that is bad for you and don’t ever put one in your mouth! But no… she notes his jeans???

I politely tell her, that wasn’t very nice to say. And he was just wearing jeans, it wasn’t weird at all.

Moving on, she helps with the elevator by pushing the {correct} buttons and we finally make it to the correct suite. She immediately finds the TV and plops her tiny tush in front. I fill out the needed paperwork and look up to see she has made some friends in the waiting room. Too cute! At least she’s not anti-social :) Although, I don’t think the other parents were quite as impressed as I was.

Kensli politely asked the two little girls what their names were. And they responded with Angel and Princess. Now… one would assume, the probably 5 and 6 year olds made these said names up. As they have active imaginations… however. When the dad said “Princess and Angel, come here, it’s time to go.” I realized… nope. That’s their names. I’m just hoping maybe it’s nicknames? However, to each their own.

Anyway

We finally get called in to have Zuri X-Ray’d, weighed, and measured. She is now 7 lbs 13 oz!!!!  Almost up 3 lbs in  almost 6 weeks! I am so proud of her! And her sister at that matter, she weighed 6 lbs 11 oz as of the 18th.

We are then sent into a little room to wait for the doc. And of course, Kensli then has to go to the bathroom. But, I was not about to load Zuri into the stroller and take the herd to find the itty bitty bathroom that was somewhere in that office. She agreed to wait until the doctor came in.

Well.. he came in and let me tell you… he was an interesting character. I think he was trying to be funny… but I didn’t find it that amusing. In fact.. I almost felt more like a moron mom who didn’t know what was wrong with my daughter.

He walks in and says “Hello, I’m Mr. Doctor. Has anyone told you why you’re here?”

“Yes, Zuri has a small heart murmur from the Twin to Twin Transfusion, and we are here at the follow up appointment for another heart echo to see how it’s doing.” Duh.

“Well. That’s all you know?”  Wait. What? Shit, there’s more? Or am I missing something? I am so confused.

“Her murmur is because of the hole in her heart…. That’s what the doctors and nurses have told me this whole time… were they wrong?”

“No. She does have a murmur. But there’s multiple causes to murmurs. And yes, hers is because of the hole. And actually, I will decide if she has an echo today or not.”

Geeez o Petes buddy. I get you are the doctor. My daughter is the patient. Is this some sort of power trip…? I really don’t know how I am supposed to respond, so all I say is “Well, that’s what I was told. I’m okay with not having an echo, but that was what the doc told me, the one who made this appointment.” And he finally dropped the I’m-a-bad-mom-act.

I hurry and take Kensli to the bathroom while the doc is giving Zuri a check up. The potty run actually goes smoothly, unlike past bathroom trips. I’m guessing because there isn’t an audience this time…

I come back and as he hands Zuri back to me, he starts to tell me how he isn’t concerned about this hole in her heart. But that’s not enough. He brought out a picture of a heart that looked like it came out of some coloring book for medical students. He had to show me everything in regards to this hole to ensure I knew every possible detail. Which- I have no problem with that… however, he talks about as fast as an auctioneer does.

At the same time as his big explanation, the twins start screaming because they’re hungry. I try to pay attention while digging through my giant diaper bag to mix up a bottle. All the while I’m holding Zuri because I still wasn’t sure if they were done with her or not.

I shove the bottle in Varah’s mouth {who is still in the carseat, which is still in the stroller} and suddenly I hear *CRUNCH CRUNCH RIIIIIP, CRUNCH CRUNCH RIIIIIIP*. Kensli decided to put herself up on the patient table and her shoes were squishing and ripping the paper that lays on top.

Who cares. She’s entertaining herself.

I look down, and Varah had puked up all the formula that she had taken and milk was everywhere. Literally everywhere. The carseat, the stroller, her outfit… the works.

Then Kensli dropped all her Reese’s pieces all over the floor.

I just start laughing. The doc is looking at me like I’m crazy and I think he was slightly frustrated at this point because he wants me to know every detail of this tiny hole they aren’t going to do anything about.

Kensli nosily hops down to pick up her Resse’s Pieces and puts them back in her baggie. I dig around the diaper bag to find a burp cloth to start soaking up the un-digested formula that lays all over the carseat and my daughter.

I then look up to find Kensli chowing down on all those Reese’s that were just on the floor. And the doctor’s jaw just dropped watching her stuff her face with those oh-so-dirty Reese’s Pieces. Mr. Doc, haven’t you ever heard of the 5 second rule? In Kensli’s case, it’s more like 10-15 seconds… but really, that’s not much of a difference at all. They keep those offices sterile right?

Once she was done eating, the doc was done talking… coincidence? I’m guessing not… So after Kensli got done picking up some of the toys that were in the room and I changed a few diapers and got Zuri clothed again, we headed for the front to set up another follow up appointment at 6 months.

I paid my co-pay and of course the twins started crying again and Kensli started walking into rooms that were meant for employees only… and the printer stopped working just in time to print my receipt. People are trying to squeeze thru me and my crew, I’m trying to keep two paci’s in two little girls mouths and I’m sternly telling a 3 year old to stay by my side.

And the cherry on top is the receptionist moves at turtle speed…. seriously. Finally, my receipt prints.

A fine young gentleman opens the door for my herd and I am pretty sure I know what’s running through his mind as he looks at my stroller: “Holy shit, that’s a lot of kids.”

That’s right boy… Take this all in. We are walking birth control.

Trackbacks

  1. […] in that crazy first appointment, we found that the hole is pretty small and too small to do anything about even if it never closes. […]

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