Just Another Day at the Hospital

Good afternoon ya’ll!!

Did you finally get outside this past weekend and enjoy the nice weather? I’ll tell you, there is just something about driving with the windows down, country music blaring, and the fresh warm air hitting your face, that makes you feel like you can take on anything! I don’t know what it is… but the country music is much more appealing in the summer. Maybe because country music stars tend to always sing about summer nights, tailgates down, and drinks up? Or maybe it’s just me.

Windows down, music up, breeze in my face!

Windows down, music up, breeze in my face!

We are doing fabulous over here! The little babes are really starting to catch on to this feeding thing. Today, Zuri was okay’d to go up to four feedings {8 is the goal, we’re half way there!} because she drank two of her entire feedings through a bottle yesterday ~ Wahoo! Rock Star Zuri over here :)  As of today, she is 6 lbs 1.7 oz… an entire 1 lb 1 oz up from her birth weight!

Zuri

Zuri

Varah is still at three feedings, but yesterday, she did take 30 out of 43 ML’s the first bottle attempt, and 20 something the second time. She didn’t take much for her third attempt on the breast. So she’s not quite up to  Zuri’s speed, but stepping up her game just the same. She is now up to 5 lbs 6.6 oz.  She’s up a lb and 1.6 oz from her birth weight.

Varah

Varah

They are doing so good, and I don’t see their weight slowing down any. Hopefully, it’ll be sooner rather than later before we get to finally come home. My nurse, Pam, told me today that their weight gain while they are premature is equivalent to what they would have gained in the womb. So at 36 weeks and 3 days, I would have had a 6 and almost 5 1/2 pounder!!! Can you imagine how big they will be once they reach April 25, their actual due date??

Zuri cuddle time

Zuri cuddle time

All smiles from Varah

All smiles from Varah

 

I also was treated to a little kangaroo time with both of them today. I got to hold them both for a half an hour, skin to skin, and I enjoyed every minute of it. I cried this time. I wasn’t holding any tears back. It is so overwhelming to have only one newborn to love, take care of, and show the world. But having two… the feeling is sometimes unexplainable.

Kangaroo Time :)

Kangaroo Time :)

Then there are other times, I get this undescribable super power feeling. I mean… come on. I make tiny humans. Two. At. A. Time. Just let your brain absorb that last sentence. I cook babies like they are going outta style and pop them out like machine guns. {Okay… maybe not so true with that last part. But. I am pretending anyway.}

So please tell me Mr. Macho Man, what is your super power? Wahahaha {That is my evil laugh}

Last day before the Twinners arrive!

Last day before the Twinners arrive!

Although, my super power did come at a price. There were many some ‘unpleasantries’ this momma had to deal with.

One is in regards to the fluid that the babies were floating around in. Zuri {A} had 18 cm of fluid in her sac, and Varah {B} had 1.5-3.5 cm. So Zuri was basically swimming in a pool. As far as she was concerned, she was in an ocean. Which is why I got the C-section. Because it was too easy for her to flip into breach position. Anyway! During my surgery, I heard the ol’ Doc tell me “You were not kidding when you said you had fluid! We now have 3 gallons contained!” Now that is clearly a shock to most. 3 gallons of fluid in one’s belly, plus 9+ lbs.. equals a non-pleasant pregnancy. But. I later found out from a nurse who was in the room at the time of my c-section they lost about a gallon in the beginning because they weren’t ready for all the fluid that was in this magnificent body of mine. She stated she wouldn’t be surprised if there were at least 4 gallons of fluid. Just ponder that sentence for a second. Picture walking up to the milk section at the grocery store, looping 4 gallons of milk onto a 9 lb belt {represents babes} and wrapping said belt around your belly. Now walk around for a few months just like that. Seem impossible? That’s why I was carrying my belly every where I went. Although, I had no idea there was that much fluid. I had no clue what 18 cm equivilated out to. I do now!

When growing two tiny humans in a pool of 4 gallons of fluid, your belly tends to get rather large. And by rather large, I mean ‘don’t-fit-thru-doorways’ large. I gained 60 lbs with this pregnancy. And before birth, I did not understand why. I was gaining in my belly only… aside from some swelling. All my clothes fit everywhere but my mid-section. So I didn’t understand how I had gained so much weight… it couldn’t have all been in my stomach right? Wrong. But since my belly had the biggest and fastest change, my body acquired some unwanted action… tiger stripes!!! Damn it, I look like a damn tiger. A pregnant one. Seriously… as if this pregnancy didn’t ruin my body enough, now it’s blessed with stretch marks.

{I am woman, hear me roar!}

I wish there was a way to cure stretch marks. Or an actual lotion to prevent them. Or anything at all. Please don’t be fooled by all those lotions that are out there. None of them work. Ask any doctor. Nothing prevents them or takes them away. A spray tan hides them a little bit better, but surgery can make them disappear completely… :)  As I mentioned before, I can be the first one in line for that with a marg in each hand.

As if all that non-sense wasn’t enough, I swelled up like a damn oompa loompa! Yes, before birth- that is typical. A lot of mom’s swell up. But holy smokes… the way I swelled up after the C-section… kinda grossed me out. And I have so many pictures to remind me if I ever forgot. I didn’t realize how bad my entire body swelled until I started looking at pictures of the babes and some that Jason took of me holding them. The first picture I saw with me in it..  dropped my jaw. I swelled up a lot more after than I did before! I hardly recognized the woman in the pictures. So when looking at the pictures on this blog or Facebook, please realize I don’t normally look like that. I’m starting to look more normal. No more Oompa Loompa Marissa.

DSC_0271

DSC_0230

My biggest craving during my pregnancy was Bacon and cookie dough. {And margaritas… but that, for some reason, was off the menu}. I based my food choices on if there was bacon in the ingredients list. Which is great considering I was supposed to be eating healthy. But! {Health nuts- skip this part} I found a new, most amazing fast food sandwich on the planet!!! Bbops Bacon Cheese Delux. That sandwich was pure glorious-ness in my mouth. And I blame my best friend Kelley for it. She gets all the blame. I hadn’t been there in probably 10 or so years… and I gave her the choice of where we went to eat that day… and well, the rest is history.

Any type of fast-action on my end was not happening. There was no more ‘get-up-and-go’ in my step any longer. In fact.. almost nothing was a good enough excuse for me to get off the couch. I couldn’t lay flat on my back, obviously. And laying on my side was so painful because it pulled on my skin and sides. When I attempted to lay on my side, it felt like someone was hanging off a cliff and holding onto my belly to pull themselves back up. So sleeping was nonexistent. So the last month and a half, I started sleeping on our love seat downstairs, because the back cushion was elevated perfectly and finally allowed me enough comfort to enable me to sleep again. Then after the c-section, I couldn’t use my abs again… so I continued to sleep on the couch until last week actually. It was a weird feeling sleeping next to someone again!

IMG_2844

IMG_2843

IMG_2836

They are just so ‘bite-sized’!

I’ll leave you with that for now. Along with a picture of Jason feeding Zuri for the first time today and Kensli’s hair-do for the day. Which by the way… I was the most amazing mom all because I curled her hair :)

 

IMG_2861

IMG_2845

IMG_2849

 

The Twinnies are Here!

Yes, I have been MIA on lots of things. Getting back to people, Facebook, here, texting… but for all good reason :)

Zuri Irene and Varah Ann were born Friday, March 14, 2014 at 7:53 and 7:54 am.  And absolutely beautiful.

{Varah is pronounced Sarah with a V}

They were born at 34 weeks, which was the furthest the doc was going to let me go due to the TTTS, but they still weighed in at 5 lbs .7 oz, 19.5 in long, and 4 lbs 5 oz 18.5 in long. I have seen some of my friends’ children shorter than that at full term! I couldn’t believe how long they were.

And for being 6 weeks early, I didn’t think 5 lbs was bad either. I believe the last 5 weeks or so, they are supposed to gain a half a pound to a pound a week… could you imagine another 5-6 lbs added onto each child. Ya, me either.

But, my thoughts are with all you past, present, and future mom’s of multiple’s who do go longer than me. Kuddos to all of you!

Well, Thursday night/Friday morning, I only got about 2 hours of sleep… and that’s a big maybe. So needless to say, once my alarm went off, I must have pushed snooze, because I woke up 15 minutes before we had to leave and my husband had just got into the shower. He is someone that needs at least an hour to get ready. Eh. I do mean that in the most lovingly way possible… {Love you honey!}

With all that, we only showed up 10 minutes late! Not so bad if I do say so myself. We’re late to everything, so why wouldn’t my twinnies arrive into the world a tad behind schedule?

We checked in and they walked us to our room ~ the room closest to the NICU ~ SCORE! We had to do some prep work, getting monitors on my belly, checking babies, getting IV started, filling out paperwork, blah, blah, blah.

Finally, it was time to walk to the operating room {O.R.}. Talk about an intense feeling. We finally made it and they made Jason wait outside the O.R. until it was time for the surgery to begin. Which of course, without my best friend, it was even more terrifying.

I open the door, and was welcomed with the whitest of walls, floor, and ceiling. Bright, giant lights lined up in multiple rows above me. Along the walls were trays full of different sized scalpels, scissors, and other lets-cut-someone-open tools. And smack dab in the middle of the room was a small single table in the shape of a cross. For me. It was officially time to be crucifiedcut open, placed on the table for my C-Section. 

After I got my spinal tap, they helped me lay down because I was already losing feeling in the lower half of my body. They tested me to make sure I couldn’t feel anything before they started slicing and dicing, and once I passed those tests, they rose the ‘curtain’ in front of me, and brought in the hubster’s.

He hung out at my head with the anesthesiologist who really helped keep me calm. Next thing I knew, minutes later, the  anesthesiologist said “Okay, Baby 1’s head is out, in just a few seconds, she’ll be free!” And literally, as soon as he finished the sentence, I heard crying. The most beautiful and sheep sounding cry I have ever heard. Jason ran over to the table they took Zuri to and started snapping pictures… {Or so I thought… I haven’t found them on my camera yet}

Then as soon as Zuri was taken to the table, it was all repeated for Varah. And I heard Varah crying and I so badly wanted to reach up and grab her and snuggle her next to me… but unfortunately for me, I was paralyzed. There was no moving.  It was a weird feeling. I couldn’t feel anything being done to me, but I could feel my body twitching as if trying to tell that spinal tap, “look here biotch, I’ll move if I want to!” But, my body was all talk.

Let. Me. Tell. You. It was a happenin’ Friday morning.

Then the NICU staff started rolling the twins by my head for me to look  at. They had them in those clear incubator looking things, all bundled up in a blanket, and all I could see was their faces. Then, they continued passed me and right on out the door. Varah following closely behind Zuri.

The worst part about the whole thing, is I didn’t get to see my girls until the following day, about 10:30-11 in the morning. More than 24 hours later. It was awful. I was vomiting until 1 pm on Friday, and then after that finally got under control, my blood pressure spiked super high. So they kept declining my continuous pleading request to go see the cutest little babes on earth.

As bad as that was, it was kind of also a blessing. I felt like shit all day, in and out of sleep. Trying to get my feeling back in my chest down to my toes. Projectiling into the tiniest little bowl you ever have seen. {Yes, turns out I have amaze-ball  skills when it comes to puking into small containers.} And of course, trying to get the pain from my itty bitty incision under control.

It was like a super bad hang over. But instead of a broken foot this time {yes, Cinco De Mayo last year was a biotch to me}, I had been sliced open.

BUT. Once I did get to see them in NICU the next day, Varah, was able to start being held and I was the first one who got to hold her. Saturday was a glorious day.

Anyway, here is a very small camera dump of the hospital stay for the first week. More stories to follow. :)

Getting ready for my C-Section!

Getting ready for my C-Section!

IMG_2742

Pictures of them the day after delivery!

IMG_2735 IMG_2731 DSC_0167 IMG_2740 DSC_0194 DSC_0185 DSC_0173 DSC_0196 DSC_0199 DSC_0201 DSC_0215 DSC_0207 DSC_0204

Loves & Toodle-os!

{Sorry all the pictures are run together. I am still getting the hang of this blogging thing. If anyone can help me upload more pictures, that’d be awesome. For some reason, it won’t let me upload more than one group of pictures. It’s really starting to make me mad!}

Monday and Tuesday Appointments

I just wanted to fill you in on the twinnies since my appointments Monday and Tuesday.

So far, as of the ultrasound at the high risk doc on Monday, we’re still sitting in the same situation. We are at a difference of fluid of 13 cm. Which makes me nervous but the doctors seem to be okay. And we just have to stay positive and trust their knowledge.

I went to my OB appointment on Tuesday and that doctor doesn’t think that we’ll be going past 32 weeks. Which is next Friday!!!!! I also turned in my giant jug of pee (which was so awesome-I’ll fill you in on that story in a minute) in, and results are back~ I am preeclampsia free! Thus far anyway.

Our growth measurements will be done next Thursday and if B hasn’t grown a whole lot, I’m guessing they’ll just pull the plug and we’ll be going in for delivery. That is less than 1 1/2 weeks! It’s getting real and scary. Real quick.

So about my jug o’pee. Before we get to sit in the waiting room, we’re supposed to leave a urine sample. Well I forgot went potty before I left, so I didn’t need to go. So, I’m just sitting in the waiting room with my brown jug, trying to conspicuously hide the giant ’24 HOUR URINE JUG’ sign pasted on the side, when the nurse comes in, loud as can be, yelling my name. Chill out lady, I’m right here. When she notices me slowly standing up, she yells, “Marissa, you haven’t peed in a cup yet?! Did you not have to pee? Or do you think you can pee now? Oh wait, I see you have 24 hours worth of pee right here in this brown jug. So maybe we won’t need your pee sample after all.” {She is a naturally, very loud person I gathered.}

{Drops head and sighs} “Yes, I have a lot of pee right here, so I really thought you’d be okay without a pee sample at this moment.”

We literally hadn’t left the waiting room before this conversation was over. So I felt great that we announced to the entire waiting room and all the other couples hanging out there, news about my lack of peeing and my giant jug.

Honestly…. good thing I’m not an uptight person, or get embarraseed easily.

Well my next appointment is tomorrow, so hopefully another update this weekend! :)

Loves & Toodle-os!

29 Weeks Preggo Picture!

Are you ready for this bad mamma jamma?!? I know I am over a week late on posting this, but better late than never… seriously, that IS my motto.

29 Weeks Preggo With Twins

29 Weeks Preggo With Twins

I mean really… I block doorways. Not cool twinnies. Not cool.

I feel like a bloated cow all of a sudden. A bloated cow with back aches. A bloated cow with back aches that can’t sleep at night. Ya… that about sums it up.

How does one’s body come back from this? Have you ever watched Click? With Adam Sandler? Maybe this will refresh your memory:

The tummy flap... Wanna tummy flap fight?

The tummy flap… Wanna tummy flap fight?

This is what I’m going to have. A tummy flap. Or do you call it a giant tongue? We could have tongue wars! Haha! {That sounds kinda bad… but hilarious!}

If this is what my body is destined to look like, I’m going to be the first mom in line at the plastic surgeon when he opens, with a margarita {heavy on the tequila} in both hands.

This Mama is NOT going to have a tummy tongue.

Instead, I have a better image in mind. My neighbor man is going to to be my ‘personal trainer’. {He may or may not really know how dead serious I am about this}

We’re going to use things I have around the house because this mama of 4 can’t afford a gym membership. I have some pre-tty cool things ya know. Like a semi tire. I can flip that baby a couple dozen hundred times.

I also really want a tattoo. {Sorry mom} But I really do. I really want a half sleeve with something relative to my 4 children. Still working on what I want… but I think that would be so cool. But that’s one of my rewards once I drop so much weight. :)

So essentially, I want to look like this:IMG_2661

Totally doable… totally doable… totally doable… don’t mind me while I try to mentally stay positive about this massive transformation.

My husband is certainly happy about my huge goals. Especially since he has a pretty clear image of where I want to be…

This isn’t impossible………….. is it?

Loves & Toodle-o!

An Update on the Twinnies!

Oh where do I begin with these two little squirts living inside of me?

Well. There has been some complications… unfortunately.

First off, with identical twins, there is a rare chance of getting Twin to Twin Transfusion Syndrome (TTTS).  Let me start by explaining this syndrome. And by no means am I a doctor, this is just what we have came to figure out.

What happens with TTTS is when twins share a placenta (which every set of identical twins share a placenta), the blood flow and other things in the placenta can get off balance in regards to how everything flows to each twin through all the vessels, and ends up all in one twin, and the other twin becomes anemic and low on nutrition, blood, etc. Essentially, one twin starts ‘stealing’ from the other.

There are 5 stages of TTTS. Stage One starts when the thief starts taking amnionic fluid from the donor twin and ends up with way more than normal, and the other twin ends up with almost nothing surrounding her.  Stage two is it starts effecting the kidneys and bladder, and the weight difference between the two starts to change drastically. Stage 3 starts effecting the heart and other organs, and stage 4 & 5 are just awful outcomes…. ending in death of one or both twins.

My beautiful babes are currently at stage one. Our biggest scare was at about 22-24 weeks…. Baby A ended up with 11 cm of fluid (3-9 cm is the normal range for twins) and Baby B was only at 1.2 cm. With a difference of almost 10 cm. That was when we were given multiple options, and out of all of them, bed rest at home was the best option we could have hoped for. The others were scary and would have made the outcome of the babies very unknown. But instead of making a drastic decision of surgery, delivery or hospital bed rest, the doctors told us to wait until the following week to see how the ultrasound goes. And then we’ll discuss our options.  “Until then, bed rest at home from now until delivery, and try and relax and not stress.” Okay. Right.

Thankfully, the bed rest had worked, and the fluid had reversed. A was just under 10 cm of fluid and B was almost to 3!!! But we weren’t out of the wood works yet.  We still had to keep a close eye on the twins until they are born. But at that point, our goal was to make it to 28 weeks. 28 weeks is the Mount Everest of weeks in premature babies as after that, brain bleeds are less likely to occur.

But I am happy to say, we have passed 28 weeks and currently I am 30 weeks today!! I am still on bed rest. Which really stinks, but I’m willing to do what needs to be done.

Currently, A is 3 lb. 8 oz and B is 2 lb. 9 oz. B is slowing down on the growing, which made me nervous at Thursday’s appointment. But the doctors didn’t seem to be too concerned. They think we’ll be fine until at least 32 weeks, but at 32 weeks, we’ll check their growth (growth gets checked every other week) and decide from there if another 2 weeks is doable or if delivery is the better option for the babies.

Right now, I am having problems. Just pain in the ass problems. First of all, I failed both of my glucose tests. Which means I technically have diabetes. So now… I have to go see a dietrician and take home a stupid finger poking machine. I also have to fast as soon as I wake up for two hours, and 2 hours after each meal and poke my finger at the end of each fast. Take the machine with me to each high risk appointment and each dietrician appointment to make sure my blood is okay. But what makes me most angry, is all the doctors said I would probably fail both tests because of the twins. It’s not an accurate test with multiples. I didn’t fail by much, hardly anything actually. But they still have to go through protocol and I have to follow the steps following the failed tests. Awesome.

Then at Thursday’s appointment, they found protein in my urine. Seriously… Why not? I mean really… I have so much on my plate with this pregnancy as is, let’s just throw that on top of it. Ready to hear what I have to do for this? Oh, it’s great. I have to pee in a giant jug for 24 hours, keep my lovely urine on ice for the full 24 hours, then take this said jug o’pee to the OB appointment, get more blood work done and see if I have preclampsia. But once again, the doctor said she thinks this is a fluke because I don’t have any of the other symptoms. So this jug thing is just to make sure I don’t have it, and protocol.

Seriously, you should see this thing!!  It’s disgusting! I pee in this giant measuring cup, and then pour it into this giant brown jug. Ya can’t miss it. I really can’t wait to carry in my giant brown jug o’pee into the doc’s office, walk past all the other patients in the waiting room and just hang out with my pee until my name’s called. AH!  I might as well have a giant sign that says “Hey!!! This brown jug here is my pee!!! 24 hours worth of it!!!”

Jealous? I figured. So that’s the things I’m dealing with right now. Along with my bed rest, twice a week appointments with my high risk doctor and my once a week appointments with the OB, the once or twice a week appointments with my dietrician, I now get to pee in a jug for 24 hours.

As much as I love seeing that my twins are still growing well on the inside, I am ready for this pregnancy to be over. It has been nothing but an emotional roller coasters and crappy luck.

But I will say, we got to avoid the fetal surgery, which is better than all the ‘bad lucks’ combined.

On the positive side, I can’t wait to meet them. My girls are fighters, especially B. And I can’t wait to let everyone know the names we have chosen for them. :)  It’s killing me not telling, but I have to have some surprise at the end! Although, we still need A’s first name. We have a few ideas, but nothing set in stone yet.

Hopefully the next post regarding the Twinnies or this pregnancy in general, will be a positive one! I’ll try to update once or twice a week to keep you all filled in.

Twin Pregnancy in Pictures

One of the regrets I had when I was pregnant with Kensli was I didn’t take any preggo self pictures in the bathroom mirror. Not so much for showing off purposes, but to be able to compare that pregnancy with future ones. Well I honestly can’t stand the weekly self pics a lot of people post on Facebook. So I decided to take a picture every 3 weeks. I also decided to start using the same shirt, so you can really see the difference between the 3 week period.

But I didn’t decide this until 14 weeks…. so from 7 weeks to 13… you’ll have to use your imagination.  And I didn’t decide to use the same shirt until 17 weeks… so I guess, deal with it. I’ll create a few more posts showing all the updated pictures in the future.  So without further ado…

14 Weeks!
Don’t mind the dirty mirror…. but my first picture with twins!

17 Weeks

17 Weeks

20 Weeks!

20 Weeks!

 

23 Weeks!

23 Weeks!

26 Weeks

26 Weeks

29 Weeks Preggo With Twins

29 Weeks Preggo With Twins

 **Update**

32 Weeks Preggo!
32 Weeks Preggo.

I tried to have a nice picture as well. :)

Night Before Surgery. Wow.

Last day before the Twinners arrive!

We Made It!

As you can see, just before 32 weeks, I couldn’t get ready. My back hurt, my stomach hurt, my everything hurt. So sitting down to put make up on was extremely difficult as is… let alone doing my hair as well. Sooooo, you are lucky there was even make-up on my face! :)

I am so happy I did this. And I love the way I did it. I just wish I had thought of it earlier in the pregnancy. But I suppose you get the idea.

I look back at some of the beginning pictures and remember thinking it was going to feel like years before they got here… and now I’m sitting here, writing this, after spending a week with my beautiful twinnies and couldn’t imagine life without them.

Loves & Toodle-os!